Friday Favorite - with a twist

This week's Friday Favorite is a bit different than any of the ones I have posted. Today I shed light on one of my favorite friendships. I have been dreading today all week. But in the spirit of mindset shifting, I am going to choose to celebrate, rather than mourn. 

On Sunday, the world lost a beautiful soul. Someone who I have known for half of my life, who loved everyone he came in contact with, and who never had a bad thing to say about anyone. He was an incredible light in an otherwise dark world, and I am going to miss him more than I ever thought I would. 

I met him my first day of high school. I was 14, almost 15, and a starry eyed freshman. I had gym in the middle of the day, and that was the first time I saw him. Naturally, I was head over heels for this guy - because he was a senior, a football player, and I swore on my life he looked like Matthew Lawrence. I see now, as I have matured (LOL), that he doesn't... but when you're young and silly - you believe what you see. 

We became fast friends. He was such a nice guy, taking the time to get to know a freshman band geek who was required to be at his every football game. He went off to college, and stayed in touch even though he was off living his best life elsewhere. He never forgot about that freshman who was drawn to him because he just radiated happiness and positivity. I went on to graduate high school and start college, where he was about to finish his final year. 

We had a bit of a falling out the summer before I started sophomore year of college. To be honest, I cannot for the life of me remember why we had a falling out, but it was pretty bad. One of my girlfriends and I attended the wake and funeral of a fellow MHS graduate that summer, and the run in I had with him was awkward. So I figured we needed more time before we could talk in a civil manner. 

I had moved on to campus early that summer for RA training, and was so excited about what the upcoming school year held. Then my mom called me to tell me that his dad had passed away suddenly. This was the first time in my LIFE that I did something that made me so uncomfortable I wanted to vomit. I picked up the phone and CALLED him. He didn't answer, but you better believe I left him a voicemail. I told him I was so very sorry to hear of his dad's passing, that I don't care about whatever it was we were not speaking over, and that I would be ready to be there for him however he needed. Then I waited.

About 2 weeks later, my computer dinged. I had an instant message from him. For those reading this that have zero idea what AIM is.. google it. He started with "hey lady" like he always did, and just started to ramble on about how sorry he was for what happened and how he appreciated my voicemail. He had moved back to school after his father's services and was starting his senior year. He was heartbroken, but he was grateful that even after all this time I was still supportive. 

(Little side bar here - unless someone has done me so wrong it's shattered my world, I am usually pretty forgiving. Which is a blessing and a curse. But I am learning where my energy needs to be and who really needs it versus who demands it and uses it.)

We kept in touch pretty regularly throughout my college career. He was staying in New York (where he went to school) to work, but I figured I would see him eventually. 

Well! My family and I went on a bus trip to NYC my junior year of college. It was a great day together in the Big Apple, a lot of fun and memories made. We stopped for lunch at Planet Hollywood that afternoon. As we were leaving I looked up and my stomach dropped. There he was. Working. Holy CRAP! I couldn't say hi - I was too sheepish at the time. My brother, God love him, goes "Hey isn't that..." I have never shushed someone so fast. Like let's just go - no need to draw attention dude. And off we went. 

Communication never stopped between us. It wasn't every day, sometimes a few weeks between conversations - but he was always checking in. Every year since we became friends, he was usually one of the first 3 people to wish me a happy birthday. 

I saw him 4 years ago at one of my classmates wakes. I wasn't expecting to see him, but life loves to surprise you sometimes. I got a text while standing in line that literally read "hey lady, nice dress." I remember it because I felt my face flush red so fast - and looked up to see him standing on the opposite side of the rotunda. He always knew how to make me feel like a million bucks, just who he was. He would rather lift everyone up than tear them down. A few days later, he shot me a text and asked me to grab drinks to catch up. Naturally I accepted. I hadn't really spent any time with him in a while, it would be nice to catch up! And boy was it ever. It was like no time had passed since we saw each other last, which is a true sign of friendship. 

I drove him home that night, and he tried to kiss me. I was like "WHAT IN GOD'S NAME ARE YOU DOING SIR?!" in my head, but at the same time freaking out because I had been hoping for that moment for 11 years.. outwardly, I turned my head so he landed on my cheek. This instance became a HUGE joke for us, after the fact. He told me to text him when I got home - which I did. His response to me getting home? Something about how his ego hurts. And an inside joke was born. "Oh, did your ego get a boo boo?" "Aww, did getting turned down hurt your feelings?" There was always some sort of underlying flirting between us when we communicated - it's just who we were. Aside from that one time, there was never an act towards any feelings - we were just better off as friends.  

Earlier this year, I happened to be scrolling Facebook and saw he had shared a video of cartoons from his childhood, one of those compilation videos. I watched it, because we were only 3 years apart, and grew up on a lot of the same shows. The following was what sparked a closer, deeper friendship - and I am so grateful that it did:

   

We started communicating 3-4 times a week after this Facebook exchange. Catching up on life, learning how we've both grown in the last few years. I went to dinner with a few friends before the Avengers this year, and wouldn't you know -  he was working at the spot we were eating. Again, panicked, I didn't bother to say hi. Plus, it was super busy so I guess it's okay. I texted him the next day and told him I saw him, and without missing a beat, he responded with "well it was rather busy so I won't let my ego bruise again... ☺" 

When I found out my roommate and I were getting a place closer to where he was living, you better believe I told him. He was so excited that I would be close by. I felt, for the first time, that our friendship was at its strongest. 

Then, Monday night, I felt like I got the wind knocked out of me. I opened Facebook and the first post I see, says he's tagged. So I read it. His brother was announcing that he had passed away on Sunday night. How is that even possible!? I talked to him last week! I called my mom and after I told her what I had just found out, the tears and audible sobs came shortly thereafter. I think I went through the seven stages of grief 3 times in one night. 

This week has been emotionally draining. He was only 32, how is this happening? I don't know what took him from this world so suddenly, but I do know that every person that he's ever been linked to is feeling this loss. The outpouring of love on his Facebook page alone shows how good of a human he was. He had flaws -  we ALL DO. But because he looked past everyone else's, I think a lot of us saw past his too. 



Garrett Michael Webb, I am mad at you for leaving this world so soon. It wasn't your choice, I get that. But now my ego is bruised because it's like I told you I was coming closer and you just didn't want me around! (I am kidding, of course, but if you know me at all you know that I tend to joke a lot more than I should).

You were one of my favorite people on earth - and I am forever grateful for the memories we made and the conversations we had over the last 15 years. You never made me feel like I was out of place in your world, or anywhere really, and I am going to hold onto everything that transpired over our friendship. You never judged me for who I was, or who I became. You accepted me where I was at, and everyone else in your world for that matter. You never pushed an agenda, tried to change people, or made people feel less than great. 

Watching any Boston sports going forward is going to feel a little weird, but we are all going to watch them with as much love and energy as you did. Clearly, Brady is going to get that 6th Superbowl ring this year - because why not?! The Sox may go to the World Series this year. But you'll already know - you've got the best seat in the house. 

In all seriousness, saying goodbye to you this afternoon will be hard. But at the same time, I will be able to let you go and start to really heal. Thank you for being such a huge part of my life for the last 15 years. Thank you for reminding me that it's okay to be who I am - no apologies needed. Thank you for supporting me when I needed it most, and for being such an incredible person to the masses of us that loved you. Your spirit will live on in those of us lucky enough to call you a friend. I am sure your dad was happy to see you, Pat probably threw you a football the minute he saw you, Tyler gave you a high five, and Mr. Nick welcomed you with an "ah good morning." 

Fly high, Webb, and make sure to visit us once in a while. Thank you for making our lives a little better by being a part of them.