Did You Really Just Say That?!

It seems that when people talk these days, not much information is absorbed from what they said. Why? Let's discuss.

1. We are so focused on having everything IMMEDIATELY.
As a society, we are expecting information on demand, when we want it. If we don't find anything out immediately, we lose interest. Our minds wander elsewhere, our attention is no longer where it needs to be.

2. Technology is distracting us.
We are very technologically focused now. Everything is centered around being connected 24/7, with the latest technology. There's no need. We scroll social media out of boredom while someone is talking to us, we focus our energy on scrolling rather than putting the phone down and listening to what the other person has to say.   

3. Selfcentered is a real thing. 
If it doesn't have anything to do with us, why would we listen? As a country, we have become so self centered that no one else's thoughts/feelings/needs matter before ours. What happened to being a decent human? Having genuine empathy for another human being isn't hard, it's a choice to shut it down. Congratulations, you're a robot.

We have lost the ideal that communication is key. Sure, you can text all day till your eyes cross, tweet away, post on Facebook, send a Snapchat, tag on Instagram. But that's not communicating. That's just talking. When was the last time you picked up the phone and spoke with someone for longer than 5 minutes? I'm talking a good, hearty conversation. When was the last time you face timed someone just to see them? 

In recent months, I have made a very conscious effort to keep my phone tucked away when I am with family and friends. I talked in my last post about being present when you are spending time and making memories with people - this also falls into that category. If you aren't listening, how will you ever know what the others are feeling/doing? You won't.

Speaking of listening...

Do you listen to how you talk to yourself? Do you allow yourself to believe the stigmas society has put on how you look or act? Do you tell yourself how important you are, how much you matter, how grateful you are? Do you speak life into your goals, dreams, and desires? Do you talk down about your appearance? Do you compare yourself to every celebrity?

STOP IT RIGHT NOW.

One of the largest hurdles on the self love journey is the acceptance of who we are in the moment. You need to love yourself where you're at. If you're not happy where you're at, embrace where you are and put a plan in place to get where you want to be. Start small. Don't go all out fresh out the gate - push past the desire to be perfect. You, friend, are perfectly imperfect, and that's what makes you YOU! The world would be a little less light without someone like you in it - so I'm very happy you're here. 

As a female (this part is for the ladies, gents.. scroll on), we are told by societal norms, that there are 2 types of bodies - thin or fat - and that being heavier than a grape is shameful. As a rather curvy girl myself, let me tell you right now that is NOT the case. And if you are struggling with this right now, hear me out. I have been 145 pounds, I've been over 200 pounds. At both points in my life, I found happiness. In different areas of life, yes, but I still found a way to own who I was (am) and radiate happiness. Sure, I would have bad days when the weight gain would over take my mind and make me feel less than adequate, but it's a part of the journey. I mentioned in the previous post that I am at a pretty unhealthy point in my life, but I identified what the issues/triggers/pressure points are (some were not discussed on here..), and am getting the help I need to fix them! I will always have curves, I've accepted that. But I also know that there is so much more in life than my weight. So yeah, it'll change. I'll find happiness in every step of this journey. 

(everybody now!)

Whether you are a male or a female (I know I have a lot of female readers, so hey girlsss), know that your weight should not define you. Your looks do not define who you are. Your overall attitude, your energy, your heart and soul - those define who you are in this world. Love yourself enough to get through the dark times, give yourself grace during the really hard times, and learn from everything. Instead of expecting people to fix or change things for you - get out of your own way and find happiness. It cannot be found in another person, in money, or in material things. It has to be found in YOU. YOU are what makes you happy. If you cannot remove yourself from any relationship (romantic or otherwise), and say "I am happy on my own." then you, my friend, need to reevaluate. If you are not happy, if you don't love yourself, how do you expect someone else to do it? 

Project the energy you want to receive. Believe in yourself. Bring happiness into your heart even when it seems impossible. Smile more. Embrace the different people in this world. Love unapologetically. Stop worrying about what others think of you - they aren't living your life. YOU are!